Enter Stage left: The Drama Llama

I’m sure we’ve all met plenty of Drama Queens in life, that one associate or friend who is often fun to be around and usually has a grand tale or twenty but their energy is erratic, their aura drips in abstract chaos and they bounce from one crisis to another. Their stories are highly embellished and they can often be heard talking at a party about how busy and important they are and how their life is – 0h! So crazy!  Sometimes you may feel slightly sorry for them as it never really seems to be their fault, they just somehow always seem to be at the centre of the drama, on a chariot of fire riding into battle with their arms in the air ready to dive head first onto the Drama Express. Choo choo! Drama is to them what 20 billion pounds is to Starmer’s black hole – they suck it right up! They have had more dramas in their lives than the whole works of Shakespeare, Tolstoy, and George Bernard Shaw combined!

While the Drama Queen can often be spontaneous and fun they can become a little exhausting! You might find your eyes scanning the room for the nearest exit or wondering how to politely extricate yourself from their whirlwind of mayhem, take a deep breath, and ensure you’re not pulled in by the tumultuous gravity of their latest Broadway show.

Why do some people thrive on drama? I have a few theories.

Boredom

If life feels a little lackluster, they start to crave excitement and what better way to spice things up than installing themselves as the Hero or Heroine in someone else’s play! They can happily play the lead role and show how important they are by always being the one at the centre sorting everything out. For some, drama can feel like a rush and release colossal amounts of endorphins. Some people can become addicted to drama as a way to fuel themselves. This is a stuck mindset that hinders genuine progress in their lives as they are focused primarily on their starring role.

Fear of safety

If they were raised in a chaotic environment, anything too safe feels unfamiliar and risky. They must instantly throw in some curveballs to jazz it up! I’m not saying they always manufacture drama, but they are often installed in everyone else’s and will be sure to sensationalize how terribly dire this situation is. Thank God they were there – the shining light in their own microcosm. The world would surely collapse without saviours like these.

Avoiding their own inner world

Sitting with your thoughts is not always the easiest, to really sit in silence and tune in to how you feel about your life. Drama is a way to distract, distract, distract, without ever really thinking about where your life is going. There’s no time for that when you are the lead role in the latest exciting Broadway play of life.

Histrionic character traits

If they fall into this category, their internal sense of self-validation is diminished and their sense of self-worth is hugely dependant on others and the approval they can gain from them. Embroiling themselves in drama has gotten them attention over the years, and it’s become a pattern when they are hungry for approval or recognition.

What are the negatives of living a high-drama lifestyle?

When you live, sleep, and breathe drama as part of your five a day, you are feeding your brain with toxic energy rather than nutritious mind food such as calm, peace and inspiration. Trapped in this cycle, personal growth is limited and it will certainly hold the bearer back from achieving their full potential. Life’s beautiful opportunities will be passed by because the Queen or King of am-dram is too busy to see them or it repels those who are focused on self-development and creating better futures. 

What to do if someone in your circle is a Drama Llama

Everyone has a crisis from time to time and it can’t be helped, but it’s important to watch out for patterns. Is this friend or associate repeatedly falling from one drama to the next? If so, you should not become entangled in their weekly soap opera. Avoid rewarding their behaviour with too much attention or playing agony aunt. You will simply be feeding the beast.

Take a break

Other than illness or death, nothing is so urgent you must respond immediately, even if the character tries to create a sense of urgency, which they sometimes will. Take time to reflect, journal, listen to some uplifting music and speak to them when they calm down. You are responsible for your own words and actions and not other people’s.  

Ask yourself why you might attract dramatic types

Are you somehow seeking to fix damaged people or drawn to excitement? Focus on your self and work on those traits. Study courses, read extensively, fill your world with enriching, uplifting moments, friends that resonate with your values and set goals to fulfil your own dreams.

If necessary, create a little distance. 

I’m sure we’ve all heard the analogy how one decaying apple can turn the whole basket rotten. Make this your life’s mantra – ‘not my circus, not my monkeys.’

Ask yourself if these were unavoidable incidents or if you are starting to see patterns of chaos, spiraling out of control around this person.

You are living your life, not someone else’s. You are the one person who can turn your dreams into reality, no one else can, so don’t give precious time and energy away to people who see you as a supporting act in their grandiloquent Broadway production. 

Focus only on what brings you peace and happiness. The less attention you give to drama, the more you will vibrate at a different level to the disruptors in life, and you will naturally start to gravitate to those who match your energetic frequency.